Carmen update: There really isn’t anything new to tell you about Carmen. She is the same. We are alternating morphine and Ativan around-the-clock and she is very peaceful and calm.
After three weeks at NY Grandma and Grandpa Camp, Lauren came home today. Tonight, we told her about Carmen. Dave and I both prayed and prayed for wisdom. Without some divine intervention, I didn’t know how in the world we would know what to say. Dave said he would take the lead and I gladly let him.
We sat on the couch and Dave said, “Lauren, you know that Carmen has a disease, Tay Sachs. And you know that Carmen is probably going to Heaven before the rest of us, right?”
Lauren answered, very seriously, “Yeah, I know that. Can we play Polly Pockets?”
Dave laughed a little and said, “Yes, we can play but first I want you to know that Carmen is going to Heaven soon. Probably within a week.”
Lauren’s sweet little face fell and she was silent. Finally she said, “It’s hard. I’ve always loved Carmen. Especially when she could laugh and smile. I’ll miss her.”
I could barely get this out but I said, “Lauren, the second Carmen gets to Heaven she will be able to laugh and smile again.”
Lauren replied, “No! Before that! The millisecond she gets there!”
I said, “You are right! What do you think the first thing is that Carmen will say?”
Lauren answered in typical six year old fashion, “My name.”
I asked, “You think the first thing Carmen will say is Lauren?”
“I bet you are right!”
We changed direction a bit after that. We talked about Carmen going to Heaven now and us going later. Lauren said, “But it’s such a long time for me. Maybe 50 years before I see Carmen!” We agreed that, yes, it will seem like a long time to us but we will see Carmen again.
We ended our talk by praying together as a family. Dave thanked God so much that Carmen is part of our family and asked that we be able to keep her comfortable.
Lauren prayed, “Dear Lord, will you please tell Hope when she is older about Carmen so she will know who Carmen is when she sees pictures? Amen.”
Somehow we got through this conversation. I’m pretty sure God was sitting right there with us.
I have to share something sweet that happened today. Every time we have talked to Lauren on the phone over the past few weeks, she has asked if Hope is crawling yet. Each time I have had to say, “No, not yet!” This morning I told Hope that Lauren was coming home today so she was going to have to learn to crawl; her sister was counting on her. I got Hope up from her nap and set her on the floor. She saw a toy a few feet away, got up on her hands and knees and leaped forward! I couldn’t believe my eyes! She has been rocking back and forth on her hands and knees for a few days but this was the first time I saw her move forward. The rest of the day she practiced scooting/leaping/crawling around the room. At 6 months and one week, Hope is a crawler. Lauren is thrilled. 🙂